Negative emotions can often spiral out of control and take one negative event and derail our lives for a much greater time period than needs be.If you find yourself involved in these types of spirals or have noticed a pattern then we have to train our minds just as we train our bodies to let the light and positive emotions back in.ANy body can learn to think positive and find the silver lining, avoid the negativity in your life, and go about the process of improving your mindset as well as improving your relationships with yourself and others around you. Im sure that you’ve realized that one negative person can bring down an entire group of people. Lets not be that person, elets be the light in the room of darkness. This all obviously easier said than done, and while there is a place for grief and all emotions are valid and should be felt, we can limit the amount of time they control us.

FInding the bright side in any situation can be difficult especially some instances more than others.  The first step to finding your silver lining to a dark cloud is to SMILE more. When you smile even if its a fake it till you make it smile, your brain activates neurological signals that actually make you feel more positive. These endorphins can actual physiologically start your bright side for you. Even if it is a struggle to maintain then smile until you can’t, rest, then start again.  When you smile the people around you will tend to smile more as well even if it’s just a polite response, which will in turn help them start their bright side mentality as well.  Even if we can’t find any reason to smile forcing it, similar to exercise, will eventually train your mind and emotions to respond more positively to your surroundings and situation.

In addition to smiling more, changing the words and phrases we use can help boost our mood and halt the negativity train.  It’s easy to use words that have the unintended negative consequence of bringing our mood down.  Using positive words and phrasing things differently can help set a long lasting foundation into staying more positive. Instead of saying things like “I’m sad” or “I’m frustrated” then try changing it to a more descriptive phrasing such as “That movie made me sad” or The task at hand is incredibly frustrating” things like this can help us determine outside sources of negative emotion and realize that it’s not solely our feelings that have made us feel this way.

Thinking positively comes from within ourselves ultimately but there are other things we can do externally to change our negative mood and mindset. Just because the day started off in a less than ideal way, does not mean that it must end that way or even maintain it throughout the day. One way to affect change on our mood is to affect the mood in others around us. WE can make a choice to spread our positive message to others and in turn actually receive positivity back. We can go out and do nice things for others even if we feel down. When we go out into the world and do things for others and we get to see the smile and happiness it brings them, we actually get a boost in mood ourselves. The smile that person has can trigger the same brain response as you forcing a smile like discussed above. A few examples of things that we can are : clean the house before your partner or roommate get home, pick up coffee or donuts for your office and coworkers, mow your neighbor’s yard, or shovel their driveway during winter, or simply compliment a stranger or say hello to someone you’ve never met.

If you’d like to think positively and be a positive influence on those around you, it’s also important to be around people that you enjoy. Solitude can be very relaxing and also very anxiety inducing depending on your situation. If being alone hasn’t helped snap you out of your “funk” then try going out with a good friend.  Friends bring out the best qualities in us if they are true and good friends. They can be supportive, friendly, and they like you for who you are!  The phrase misery loves company can also be used in the reverse. Happiness loves company and also loves to be spread. On the same token, if you have a friend or person you hang out with and they tend to bring you down or are constantly negative, STOP hanging out with that person. You don’t have to be rude or callused in your approach, but being honest and explaining that their negative energy is very draining and puts you in a bad mood could point out to someone something they’ve never realized themselves. The friendship could actually be saved along with your sanity and mental wellbeing.

Positive attitudes can also be spoken into existence, and like a magic spell we just have to find the right words or mantras to help us. SPeaking positive phrases, writing them on pieces of paper and putting them in your wallet, or changing your phone wallpaper to some positive phrase or saying that inspires you can be a daily or more reminder to maintain your positive view. Another simple way is to subscribe to to a social media account with this general idea in mind. One of my favorites is Power Thoughts Meditation club, they have amazing videos and meditation music in addition to their facebook page that sends out positivity memes everyday or every other day. These quotes and thoughts help put our current situation into perspective and make our bad day pass more quickly.

In conclusion, there are several ways to become a more positive person, but ultimately it comes down to a choice each and every individual wakes up with every morning. DO I LET THE OUTSIDE WORLD WITH ALL ITS CHAOS AND UNPREDICTABILITY CONTROL MY MOOD OR DO I CONTROL IT?  When we allow external influences to make us into something we don’t like or want to be we are giving over our control. Don’t give up your control, make the positive choice, and as Ghandi said “BE the light that you want to see in the world”.